So I had a mini cry fest last night (ok ok... ugly
cry for a little bit) and said something I never ever thought I would say...
"I miss being pregnant"
Yep. I do.
I never ever thought I would feel this way. I felt like absolute dog
crap for the first half of this pregnancy and (as grateful as I was to
be growing a baby) I couldn't wait to get the whole labor thing over
with and just hold my little one in my arms. Now that she's here... I
kind of miss the excitement, the anticipation, the "is it a boy or a
girl" and the "s/he's all mine" feeling.
I felt similarly after I
got engaged and after my wedding. I wanted nothing more than to be
engaged... then once I had the ring on my finger I missed the "is he
ever going to ask" and "I wonder if today is the day and how he is going to do it"... then I counted down the days to my wedding and just couldn't wait to be a "Mrs"... but once it was over and life settled down, I remember getting teary eyed that our big day had passed... it was over, done, never to be enjoyed again. I wanted to turn back the clock and savor the anticipation, feel those butterflies again as I walked down the aisle, make our first dance last just a few minutes longer, enjoy our last dance one last time.
I love being married and I love being a
mom, I wouldn't change my life for anything in this world... but part
of me really wants to go back and re-live the days/weeks/months leading
up to those life changing events (even the labor part... now I KNOW I'm
nuts). People told me in the first trimester (when I was unbelievably sick and miserable) that I would miss this... I thought they were nuts. But now I would give anything (well not anything, but close) to go back in time, slow it down and soak it all in. It really went by way too